Don't give up... There's HOPE. even when it doesn't seem like it.

Hi my name is Jessica Barnwell...

and I would like to share my story to hopefully help someone else who's going through a hard time in life . and has all but given up on themselves and life.

DON'T GIVE UP!

IT DOES GET BETTER.. IT CAN SOMETIMES SEEM LIKE IT NEVER WILL. BUT AS LONG AS UR STILL BREATHING I KNOW FROM EXPERIENCE THAT U CAN OVERCOME ANYTHING....

and plz bear with me as I tell you my story cuz I'm not good at expressing my feelings and am still trying to come to terms with it myself. Ty !

I'm brad barrs ex girlfriend and we were together for almost 4 yrs. But we remained friends until he passed away this year. Which is why I'm telling my story and still trying to cope with everything. I'm now 36 yrs. Old and have been through some things that most people could never imagine and I pray that they don't. I moved to Sanderson Florida when I was 12 yrs old from Birmingham Alabama. And that's where it all began for me. my life was always unstable as a child and I got with my kids father when I was 14 yrs. Old . My mom and brother moved back home to Alabama and I stayed with Brandon and later on ended up having 4 good looking boys together. Well long story short it was cut short when I got the news that he ( Brandon) my kids father and best friend had been shot and killed by his then step father. My heart hit my feet.... I never thought about what if something happened to him and I'm all alone with 3 small children and 3 months pregnant with the 4 th child. I completely panicked.. I only remember bits and pieces but I remember looking at my kids and thinking to myself that I'm responsible for these little lives. and I remember thinking and telling myself that I didn't wanna mess them up and raise them how I was raised moving all the time from family members to other family members,drug addiction mental health problems etc.

And all of a sudden there I was standing in our house all alone still trying to understand what was happening and how did it happen so quickly. To be continued.... Sorry this mite take a lil time but trust me it's worth it.